^^^^^^^^^^

December 23rd, 2022

Hear* it comes again. The rain on the roof is such a generous soundtrack.

I haven't had a winter for a decade and I heard it might be coming, so I drove 45 minutes each way to the Trader Joe's, and I charged my dildo, and I put firewood to dry by the back door. I did my laundry. I have some mending to do. I think I'm ready. I don't like to check the weather. I like to walk outside.

Performed ritual on the farm for the solstice, before the impulse to stock up on groceries that feel familiar. Single moms like TJ's.

I wore a trend I really got off the ground in the fifth grade. So much happened that year, still. Leggings under ripped up baggy jeans. I don’t have floral leggings anymore, but I do have a chocolate unitard and put on shredded denim + a silk house coat + one of those hair bands that goes ^^^^^^^^^^ + a puffy 80’s bomber. White sneakers. Walked the high point of the farm in peak sunlight, no tow required, and then went to stock up the house for my growing up boys.

My business is my daughter. She too's been gearing up for a growth spurt. She requires extra sleep right now. I have sympathy growing pains. My right arm is a mess and it doesn’t take deep thinking to figure that one out.

I’m not jealous of my daughter. I want her to look and feel her best. Excited to help her as much as wants my help — shopping for new clothes, new shoes, building a new digital home! Mindset matters.

Take the keyssss

David Lynch calls the mantra a key to transcend

There’s no way to save yourself. You decide to save yourself. You do what you know you need to do. This requires tremendous faith.

The rain turned to snow for 20 beautiful minutes. Lord, a lot can happen in 20 minutes.

And the geese flying overhead — another generous sound and site.

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