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What if your whole life you strived to make the inappropriate appropriately easy? What if you normalized unreasonable expectations until Soul cries out to you, crying while drowning in a sea of never ending _______ (chores 4 maintaining broken systems). Pleading for openness — an expanse of experimental time and space — S u p p o r t m e w h i l e t h e w o r l d s t i l l s p i n s ✩ she criessss

Any systems
you're bold enough
to fix before _______?

Cranky not getting attention soul crossing the mind-body barrier: Hair falls out clumpy, eyes going fuzzy, and nervous system the bad kind of buzzy --- each together demanding you hold still and honestly account for where you've been and where you're going (bumpy)

Would you answer?

Could you not? 

But because *we are where we are until we aren't* the sole question really boils down to:

What does it cost to listen to your soul? 

Remember

Your soul like a child allowed to be a child — I need something, not this. I don't know what, but help me because I'm overwhelmed and crying for you. Change me, feed me, hold me, figure it out for me, with me. P r i o r i t i z e 4 m e ✩

I was born into my pattern. I married it, procreated with it and co-parent with it 👅👅👅👅👅👅 then I push it further, falling farther in love with it, fuck it so good from any-every angle 👅👅👅👅👅👅👅👅 Then there's me. Me as in Us. And I want to be a baller baby dadi beholden to Soul — my long abandoned daughter — and my sons — my living, breathing, fascinating true family who show me more grace, more patient L O V E than I have ever known.

You're doing the same. You're propagating your pattern. Did you follow the rules and put your mask on first? Or is the role you play the mask you're drowning behind? (The Rules.) Trick questions.

And your patterned babies are lovable and deserving of love, as they do what they're designed to do, eating up resources ∴ demanding you self resource like you've never known how.

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Is that why we are here? To live the immersed pattern until we can identify the pattern, see it separate from Self, see ourself putting it down, Pattern down on the ground, gently backing away from maintaining the broken ∴ moving towards  fulfilling Soul's callings, with all the precious babies strapped to your chest, your breasts, your back, sat up on your shoulders. Responsibilities stemming from iteration after iteration, held close, arms free for the labor required to live the alchemical transformation:

N U R T U R I N G w e